The Weight We Carry
What Gypsy and Traveller people told us about mental health, grief, pressure and support
Some things are carried quietly because people have learned it is safer not to say them out loud.
The Weight We Carry is a short animation created from conversations with Romany Gypsies, Irish Travellers and Scottish Gypsy Travellers about mental health, grief, pressure, survival, strength and what good support really looks like.
This is not a film about what is “wrong” with our communities.
It is about understanding what people may already be carrying.
WATCH THE WEIGHT WE CARRY
This film talks about mental health, grief and people reaching crisis. Please watch it when and where feels right for you.
It’s also available on YouTube linked below
Why we made this film
We started this work because we were hearing worry, loss and pressure — but people did not always use the words “mental health.”
People talked about:
“My nerves.”
“I’ve got too much on my mind.”
“I’m not coping.”
“I’ve just got to carry on.”
“I don’t want people knowing.”
“I’ve got to be strong.”
That matters.
If services are waiting for somebody to use the right clinical words before recognising that they are struggling, they may miss what that person is actually trying to say.
So instead of beginning with a questionnaire, diagnosis or assumption, we began by listening.
And people talked
When we began, we genuinely worried that people might not want to speak about subjects this personal.
What happened was almost the opposite.
Across the work there were:
131 individual conversations
188 people reached through community events
Around 250–300 people spoken with overall
These figures overlap and should not be added together. They represent the reach of the work rather than three separate groups.
People spoke through one-to-one conversations, community events, Ladies’ Days, cups of tea, familiar relationships and ordinary conversations.
That became one of the biggest findings in itself:
Gypsy and Traveller people are willing to talk.
But trust cannot be rushed.
People were more able to speak when they knew who was asking, understood why they were asking, had choices about how much they shared and were in spaces where they did not feel exposed or judged.
Engagement is not something a community either has or doesn’t have.
It is shaped by the relationship.
What are people carrying?
Mental health rarely sat separately from everything else happening in people’s lives.
People talked about layers of pressure building over time:
Racism.
Grief and bereavement.
Family responsibility.
Money worries.
Poor or insecure living conditions.
School and bullying.
Relationships.
Isolation.
Judgement and gossip.
Loss of culture and belonging.
And the expectation to simply keep going.
One difficult event might be the moment somebody reaches crisis.
But that does not necessarily mean it was the beginning of the story.
Sometimes it is simply the final weight added to something a person has already been carrying for months — or years.
That idea became the heart of this animation.
When strength becomes another weight
People often talk about Gypsy and Traveller communities as strong.
And we are.
But strength can become an expectation too.
Women spoke about expectations around family, motherhood, keeping everything together and fears about what might happen if they admitted they were struggling.
Men described pressure to provide, protect, fix things and remain strong even when they were struggling themselves.
Young people can find themselves carrying expectations from home, school, relationships and wider society while also navigating racism, identity and belonging.
None of these experiences apply to everybody.
But something important came through repeatedly:
Being strong should not have to mean being silent.
The outside world adds weight too
We cannot talk honestly about Gypsy and Traveller mental health without talking about racism and discrimination.
People described being judged before they had spoken.
Being treated as suspicious.
Seeing their homes or culture described as a problem.
Children experiencing bullying and exclusion.
Families repeatedly having to fight to be treated fairly.
Preparing yourself for the next comment, refusal, headline, suspicious look or difficult interaction takes energy.
That repeated experience has a cost.
Mental health support cannot only ask people to become better at coping with difficult circumstances.
Sometimes we have to change the circumstances too.
Family and community
One of the most important things we heard was that two things can be true at the same time.
Family and community can be an enormous source of:
love
belonging
practical help
protection
identity
purpose
and strength.
They can also be places where people worry about judgement, gossip, disappointing somebody they love or private information becoming known.
That does not make family or community the problem.
It means support needs to understand the complexity of people’s lives.
For one person, speaking with another Gypsy or Traveller person may feel safest because they do not have to explain their culture.
For somebody else, speaking with someone outside the community may feel safer because privacy matters more.
Real choice matters.
What keeps people going?
Our conversations were not simply a list of problems.
People also told us about strength, purpose and connection.
They talked about:
Children and family.
Culture and identity.
Animals and nature.
Faith.
Work and routine.
Having a role and feeling useful.
One person they could trust.
Those things matter.
Good support should recognise and strengthen what is already helping people survive and live well — not assume that every answer has to come from outside the community.
What does good support feel like?
People did not describe a complicated new service model.
Again and again, the things that mattered sounded remarkably human.
Someone who listens.
Someone who does not immediately take over.
Someone who comes back.
Someone who understands culture without making assumptions.
Privacy.
Choice.
Flexibility.
Practical help.
And support being available before everything reaches crisis point.
The relationship isn’t an extra to the work.
The relationship is the work.
What services need to hear
Responsibility for change cannot sit only with the people already carrying the greatest weight.
We cannot repeatedly ask communities to trust services without asking services what they are doing to become trustworthy.
That means:
Don’t wait for crisis.
Build relationships before asking people to disclose deeply personal things.
Recognise racism and discrimination as part of the picture.
Meet people where they are.
Listen for the words people actually use.
Give people genuine choice.
Make good practice normal practice — not something people receive only when they happen to find one exceptional worker.
Trust grows when people can see tangible evidence that something is being done differently.
About the work behind The Weight We Carry
The Weight We Carry grew from Proud Gypsy Traveller CIC’s community-led work exploring mental health, grief, pressure, suicide prevention, trust and support within Gypsy and Traveller communities.
This work has developed alongside the University of York, including the Hidden Troubles and Crossing Boundarieswork exploring how mental health and suicide-prevention support can be better understood and shaped with communities rather than simply designed for them.
At the centre of all of this work are the people who trusted us enough to speak.
Some conversations were long.
Some were a few sentences.
Some happened formally.
Many happened over tea, at events, through familiar relationships or while talking about something completely different.
Every one helped us understand a little more about what people carry — and what might help make that weight lighter.
This film belongs in more than one place
We want The Weight We Carry to be watched and talked about.
By families.
By community groups.
By health professionals.
By commissioners.
By councils.
By researchers.
By people designing services.
And by anybody who wants to better understand what may sit behind the words:
“I’m fine.”
You are welcome to share the film.
If you are a service, organisation or training provider and would like to use The Weight We Carry as part of a conversation, training session or event, please contact Proud Gypsy Traveller CIC
If this has brought something up for you
You do not need to wait until things become unbearable before asking for support.
If you need urgent help with your mental health in England, you can call NHS 111 and select the mental health option.
You can also call Samaritans free on 116 123, day or night, if you need somebody to talk to.
If you or somebody else is in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E.
And where you can, talk to somebody you trust.
A family member.
A friend.
A community worker.
A health professional.
Someone who will stay and listen.
The Weight We Carry
People often talk about strength when they talk about Gypsy and Traveller people.
They are right.
We are strong.
But strength should not mean carrying everything alone.
Sometimes the weight doesn’t simply disappear.
Sometimes another pair of hands reaches out.
And the weight is shared.
You do not have to carry it alone.
Proud Gypsy Traveller CIC